I am so lost with you. I love you so much but you treat my like garbage. I tell you I want to make things better and you spit in my face. I don’t know if I can go on anymore. I am so tired and sad. So sad all the time. It feels like you disappeared and this other person who just resents me took your place. I miss you so much.

I think you broke my heart.

Maybe we just met too soon, maybe I should have been alone a bit longer? Maybe I am not ready for this yet, maybe we are too different after all. Maybe you don’t even love me. And it’s so sad that even if you didn’t, it wouldn’t be so awful. I don’t really care if you do or don’t. And you can blame yourself for that. 

I am so tired of how you treat me. You know I love you and I would do absolutely anything for you. Anything. And what do you do? I come to you in need and you get angry. What kind of person does that? If you came to me crying I would take you to my arms and do my best to make you feel better. 

All I think about now is how we are reunited in a week and how I end up asking you to leave.

And we will be together again